Let’s Practice Being Concise (7 of 8)

By | May 11, 2017

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In the previous post, I quoted from my own IELTS Writing Task Two book (Page 33, at the bottom). This page compares the sentence …

When people try to park cars in cities, they usually find it difficult. [13 words]

with …

Parking cars in cities is usually difficult. [7 words]

and concludes …

This new sentence is much shorter, and makes the same point. That is, the sentence is concise, and concision is a sign of a good writer.

This rule should be your rule in IELTS Writing. If a sentence can make the same point in fewer words, WRITE THAT SENTENCES! You then have time to …

  • write more,
  • say more,
  • and achieve more of the task.

It’s time to practice.

Try making the following sentences more concise.

  1. The astronauts may bring back viruses which are harmful to human health when their missions are completed. [17 words]
  2. Capital punishment is a good deterrent to people, making their desire to commit a crime less strong. [17 words]
  3. Purchasing online is often a more economical option to choose merchandise. [11 words]
  4. [Examples of crime]. And that is the reason why judicial systems exist. [9 words]
  5. Creating a better living environment and making people have a better quality of life is the main difficulty. [18 words]
  6. It is an inevitable development that the technology will always change. [11 words]

Answers to Being Concise (6 of 8).

  1. Hospitals can provide better health care. [6 words; originally 16]
  2. This helps them to deal with foreign threats. [8 words; originally 11]
  3. The nicotine in cigarettes is addictive. [6 words; originally 11]
  4. People will think more carefully before smoking. [7 words; originally 16]
  5. Imagination inspires scientists to invent products. [7 words; originally 11]
  6. People can watch each others’ health. [6 words; originally 12]

Author: Andrew

Andrew Guilfoyle Cambridge CELTA, Cambridge DELTA, Cambridge CELTA teacher-trainer, M.Ed