Logic (7 of 10)
One of the biggest problems in IELTS essays is a lack of logic. IELTS writing needs to be detailed and accurate, and you have to hit the target, dead centre, to get a high IELTS mark (hence the picture). So, let’s start thinking everyone.
Try to work out the logical problems with the following sentences. The answers will be given and explained in the next post.
- He needed help to quit his smoking addiction.
- Smokers think this habit helps them release stress.
- Raising cigarette prices will make smokers stop to buy cigarettes.
- Smokers are addicted. That is why they are willing to buy cigarettes.
- It started to decline until the end of the year.
Answers to Logic 6 of 10
Here are the answers to the previous post.
I will give the original illogical sentence, then my comments.
- By deterring criminals, it would lower the crime rate.
The sentence is circular. It is similar to saying, ‘A circle is round because it is circular’. In other words, ‘deterring criminals’ already means ‘lowering the crime rate’. The sentence does not need to be written.
- The necessity of smoking is a noticeable issue.
How can a necessity be noticed? The student should write,
Smoking is a noticeable trend.
Smoking is noticeable in society.
- As technology develops, computers are one of the effective inventions.
The logic of the sentences as
‘As sth. happens, [logical result].’
‘As people grow older, they experience more health problems.’
The student has not written a result, but just a historical fact. Perhaps the student could write, …
‘As technology develops, computers are becoming more powerful.’
- According to the development of the internet, online shopping is very effective.
We use ‘according to’ to prove the authority of a statement.
‘According to doctors, we should wash our hands before eating.’
‘According to my father, it didn’t happen that way at all.’
The student needs to write,
‘With the development of the Internet, online shopping has become more effective’.
- With the constant progress of technology in the future, people …
How can technology be constantly progressing in the future? No one knows the future. Maybe there will be a nuclear war in the future. Take out ‘in the future’.